Sunday, 20 February 2011

Boom! Boom!

There's been some rantin' out there about Selfish Baby Boomers. (Yes - I am a Boomer.)

Apparently we are a scheming, selfish generation - who sit around up there in the clouds... with our proverbial Storks... until we spot a Good Time coming. That's a Good Time with "free education and health care", plenty of employment, and big, fat pensions.

Upon spotting this Utopia, we click our chubby little fingers at the Stork, point earthwards, and demand a lift. Down we float. Down to an unsuspecting parental couple who are still reeling from World War Two.

Having arrived - we fatten up on National Health orange juice (I can taste it now) and stroll through our free education - primary, secondary and higher - until we emerge into adulthood. After packing in some Feckless Years full of Free Love, Hippiedom, and Pointless Globe-trotting .... we slide into Cushy Jobs for Life that guarantee Fat Pensions.

Settling into this adult world, we accumulate money by the bucketful and buy up all the available housing stock. Then we manage both to "Retire Early at 50 and Live the Life of Reilly" and to "Hog Our Jobs until we are at least 73". In this manner we simultaneously manage to use up all the Pension Pots and to Deprive Following Generations from jobs. Whilst we are about it - we ruin this planet for our successors by flitting around emitting carbon as quick and as much as we can: planes for Jolly Jaunts, revving our Gas-Guzzling 4x4s, and Heating Homes that are Far Too Large for us. And don't get me started on the Third World Child Labour we personally enslave to provide us with our Throwaway Consumerist Lifestyles.

Blimey! No wonder I dream about cake.

But hang on there. What is that other odour in the air? Underneath the cinnamon vanilla mocha mocha top notes of cake icing? It's something more... earthy... something more... animal.

I know what it is. It's Scapegoat!

(Stay Posted for Rant 2 and History From my Point of View.)

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