Bbbrring-brrringg.... go the landline phone.
At my age this do not presage well. "Who be dead?" Thinks I.
Have you ever had a text read out on your landline? It be like getting a message from a Satnav. Automated voice in pleasant female tones ... but disturbingly all the wrong intonations.
Anyway the message be that: "Praise the Lord!" there be a young nephew born xxxxx.
I no longer have relatives young enough to develop a baby nephew... I think someone pressed the wrong button.
Still. Happy Birthday, stranger's nephew.