The Old Man's Hair Stands On End: A Letter From George

Oh but The Old Man is furious today... and has been for several days. You see, we each get a letter from the Chancellor of the Exchequer. No. Really. From George himself. It do have a photo of him at the top of the page... freshly coiffed, smoothly skinned, straight off his 5:2 diet... and smiling at us.
This is because we are of a certain age. So he is writing to us about Pensioner Bonds. The Old Man explodes.... Is there a public list of pension age people? Has George used government money to compile the target list? How much does that cost? Huff-puff.
Me? Golly I have not received a letter from a minister before ...  about my taxes... my health.... my education... whatever. It's very flattering isn't it. It's a wonder he do have the time to write to little old me.
Does he think it make me vote for him?